guilt.

I met the most lovely high-powered career lady / brand-new mom the other night. Within moments of chatting, she emphatically encouraged me to keep doing what I do to help other parents. She explained that women like her “have no idea” what they are doing and that women like her “need all the help we can get”.

Women like her?

“There are days when I only see my baby for thirty minutes,” she explained. I could tell by the look on her face that she was bracing herself for whatever words of judgement, advice or consolation she’d conditioned herself to hear, none of which I had to offer.

All I heard was a new mom trying on a sentence she wasn’t quite sure fit.

Me: Do you love your job?

Career Mom: Yes.

Me: Do you love your son?

Career Mom: Yes.

Me: Does he greet you with open arms and a contagious smile every day when you walk in the door?

Career Mom: Yes. {tears}

Me: Then what’s the problem?

Career Mom: I just feel so guilty. I worry that it just isn’t… enough.

Me: I know the feeling… And I see my kids all the time.

Why is that? Why do we as parents feel so guilty no matter how much or how little we give to our children?

So often we feel guilty because we compare the amount of love we have for our children with the things we aren’t doing or think we should be doing. When we don’t meet our own high expectations, we come up short and we feel it isn’t… enough.

But here’s the deal. Our kids don’t track our hours. They don’t count the minutes. They don’t comprehend the passing of time. They don’t judge us the way we judge ourselves. They don’t complain about our parenting style. They are blind to our self-prescribed shortcomings.

Children live in the moment. And if all we have today is that moment, we can’t squander it with distractions of guilt but rather fill it with love and an open heart.

And that is always… enough.

aMomentWithEmmeline

Written by Ashley Bond

Ashley Bond

Founder of parenting blog, entrepreneur, underestimated disorganized overachiever.

If you liked this, you might also like:

Comments

  1. Tears. Thank you for that. Sometimes we moms need to hear exactly those very words.

  2. Love this Ash! It’s a daily internal struggle & this is a great reminder…it’s about the moments.

Skip to toolbar